Ep. 31 How to Use Cycle Syncing to Work Smarter and Show Up Stronger with Xayli Barclay

In this episode, we’re diving into a simple, but powerful system that’s already built into your body: your cycle. If you’re a busy service provider or entrepreneur struggling to stay consistent, get more done, or show up with energy in your business, this episode is for you.

I chat with Xayli Barclay about how she aligns her work with the natural peaks and dips in her energy throughout her cycle. From creating content to working with clients, and big brands, she shares practical ways to plan your work according to your body’s rhythm, so you can maximize your productivity without burning out.

You’ll learn:

• What cycle syncing is and why it’s a game-changer for entrepreneurs
• How to identify your high-energy days versus your low-energy days
• Simple ways to plan your content, meetings, and tasks around your energy peaks
• How using your natural rhythm can improve consistency and reduce overwhelm
• Why this system works even if you’ve struggled with traditional productivity hacks

By the end of this episode, you’ll have actionable ideas for using your cycle as a tool to show up stronger, smarter, and more consistently in your business.

⭐CONNECT WITH XAYLI BARCLAY - Visibility Strategist & Camera Confidence Expert. Helping you Show Up WELL—on camera, in your body, mind, and in your business

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🎙️ABOUT THE HOST

Hi, I'm Kenniqua Lewter, Client Experience Systems Strategist, HoneyBook Educator, and the host of the Systems Rehab Podcast. I help service providers create client experience systems that save time, strengthen client relationships, and build a business that runs with ease. 

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Transcript

Kenniqua Lewter (00:00)
I'm joined here by the Xayli Barkley. Me and Xayli actually go back a while as we have been socializing on...

social media, Instagram, I met Xayli first on YouTube when I was trying to figure out how to show up on camera. And so that's when I ran into Xayli and she was the one that really helped me to get my camera confidence. So today's episode is going to be a juicy one because today we're going to talk about something specifically that Xayli does in order to be able to show up in her best self for her business. So before we dive into it,

I actually just want you to go ahead and introduce yourself for those that do not know you.

XayLi Barclay (00:44)
Yeah, hi guys. I'm so excited to be here. It feels like such a full circle moment because Kaniko is someone that I really admire in the online space. So I am Zayli Barkley. I'm a camera confidence coach and visibility strategist. I love helping people really pull out their best in the online space on camera and just within themselves as well, because that's a deep part of showing up confidently, right?

But yeah, I love helping people who are so genius behind the scenes to build brands that are more forward facing or front facing so that they can really position themselves to get the opportunities that they secretly desire, I feel like.

Kenniqua Lewter (01:24)
definitely. I appreciate you joining me here today. tell us a little bit about what it is that you do as far as helping entrepreneurs to be able to show up in their businesses. Can you tell me a little bit more about that and then we can kind of go into the to the way you actually show up?

XayLi Barclay (01:41)
Yes. Okay, so I feel like even in my own journey and story, there was a time where I was very much behind the scenes and just nervous about putting myself out there. I'm an introvert. So people never believe that when I say it, but I really am. And I had to learn how to navigate in the online space because I saw that everyone that was excelling and exceeding and building powerhouse brands, they were on camera. And so I put myself out there.

I got on camera, at that time I was more in the beauty content lane and as I started doing that people started asking me all about my tech and cameras and all of that and that's a huge part of what I absolutely love in the least over technical way ever. I'm the person that has great quality, great sound but with the least things going on because I don't like overthinking things.

And so I realized that as I grew, there was a space for coaches who were confused about both sides, the technical aspect of getting things set up and also just the confidence to show up on camera, to sell on camera, do webinars, build audiences, build rich communities and get mind blowing opportunities. And that was something that I had walked the long and hard way with.

And so now I'm able to help others just amplify their presence, especially in what feels like a saturated world in the online space. So that's really how I help. help with storytelling. I help with the technical aspect, of course. So we teach that on a regular basis as well. I run a really amazing membership where we do all of that behind the scenes. And so it's really those people who are at a point where they're trying to

build community, build their brand so that they can get out from being only behind their business, have other people run behind the scenes and they're ready to step up because they do feel that calling to step into another level of something that they've been burning. There's a burning in their belly to share a message that they know has to reach more people. So that's really what I help with.

Kenniqua Lewter (03:47)
Yeah, absolutely. so like kind of just circling, circling back one of the things when I first started my business, so I started in 2017, but I didn't start creating video content until 2020 where I was kind of pushed to like, okay, I think I need to start getting on YouTube, which has been an absolute game changer for me because I also am an introvert. So me going through it just

XayLi Barclay (04:10)
Yeah.

Kenniqua Lewter (04:15)
networking at in-person events and things like that has never really been my thing. So video content has been the major thing where people could just come to me. I could just put my content and I can draw you in. But definitely one of the things that I struggled with, which I think that a lot of people, maybe not a lot, but I know that quite a few people probably struggle with as well, is when I start getting on camera is that I

XayLi Barclay (04:28)
you

Kenniqua Lewter (04:43)
didn't have that confidence because I was overweight and I just didn't like necessarily the way that I looked on camera. And so when I was looking, I think I found you initially from like a Thinkific video. And so I'm like, man, this girl, looks like you, your presence on camera is just.

crazy, you know, it's like she is. So I'm like, okay, and you know, you're one of us. And I'm like, and in the background and everything that you had going on, I'm like, okay, I have to start following this girl to see what she has going on. And so that's kind of like how I dove into that world. So definitely you have helped me significantly to be able to show up on camera. So let me ask you, so when it comes to because I know that when we're running our businesses, just like you're introverted, I'm introverted.

XayLi Barclay (05:15)
you

Kenniqua Lewter (05:32)
I know for me, it takes a lot of energy to actually produce video content. Like I have to be feeling it sometimes. Otherwise, I'm more disciplined now to do it even if I'm not, but my feelings have to be kind of in it. How do you navigate that as an introverted ⁓ entrepreneur?

XayLi Barclay (05:55)
Yeah, I mean, there are different things that I do that can definitely set me up for success. the first thing is I make sure that most of my public facing content or appearances, especially if it's live, is going to be during my ovulation phase, right? So that's one of the first things I think about. Obviously, as a business owner, it's not always going to be that way. So for me, I have things that I do to get me in the mood if I'm not in the mood.

Right? So I might listen, you know, first of all, grounding myself is so important because a lot of times we're going through lots of things, lots of changes, things are happening because life is lifeing. And so it would really be about grounding myself and asking myself, how do I want to feel after I've recorded this video and really root or ground myself in that moment of what the after could look like? Because my after always connects to the people that I'm going to serve. So

Kenniqua Lewter (06:23)
Okay.

XayLi Barclay (06:51)
That's the first way that I ground myself. After I figured that out, I'm sure to make sure to set up my space in a way where I have something, a candle burning or something that, you know, puts me in the mood, like whether it's music or motivational talk, I have a few ones that I really love and always kind of go back to that I've bookmarked. So I really focus on changing my own mindset because I do know that the value of what I'm sharing

I'm pouring that into someone else. example, have you ever had a friend call you? You're having a good day and that friend calls and they dump everything on you and you leave the call feeling like so much more drained than you got onto it. Right? So when we get on camera, we don't want to be that friend. So we have to make sure that we do feel good about.

Kenniqua Lewter (07:29)
Yes, exactly.

XayLi Barclay (07:39)
the energy that we're pouring into others because we do have a responsibility as creators. Now, let me tell you, if that does not work, I will get on. And I think that one of the most authentic, and people throw that word to me a lot, one of the most authentic things that I can do is address the situation. So if I'm not feeling great, I'll address it. And a lot of times, because you're pouring into other people, you kind of talk yourself through what you're going through.

kind like therapy and you realize okay I needed this I needed to do this in order to get to the other side so those are three things that I kind of walk myself through but it always gets done.

Kenniqua Lewter (08:19)
It always gets done. Yeah, I really do love that perspective. So I know that when it comes to you've been doing cycle syncing for years at this point with trying to or not trying to you. This is what you've been able to accomplish successfully is to be able to go through and sync your cycle with.

Basically the way that you are filling your energy and that has really been a driving force for your business and you show up consistently so How do you just?

Do you go through, so during that period of the ovulation period, do you say that, okay, well, first of all, let me ask you, this probably would be the better question to ask for some people that may not be aware is what are those phases? What are the four phases? I know there's like typically like four phases. What are the four phases that are in the cycles and what do you do during each phase of that cycle before actually getting onto camera?

XayLi Barclay (09:17)
Yeah, mean, okay, so we have as women a full menstrual cycle and inside of that cycle, we have four phases. Sometimes you'll see people say three phases, but I think about it in four phases just so that I'm really grounded. the first, and I think about it in four phases, let me say why, because menstrual for me is a whole phase that I need to account for because I've always had really tough menstrual.

cycles, right, the actual cycle in itself. I have endometriosis and so I am probably down for two or three days. So the first phase of the menstrual cycle is for me, I like to think about it because some people will start at menstrual. For me, I feel like the follicular is a brand new life. It's like the rebirth. So I think about the follicular phase, right, that is right after your menstrual cycle is done.

Kenniqua Lewter (09:52)
Yeah.

XayLi Barclay (10:10)
And so in that phase, I am excited. I have all the ideas. I'm talking too much. I always have a brand new business idea for my husband. And he's like, OK, you're infallicular. So it's where I'm the most excited about life, business, and all the things. It's like I'm experiencing a literal rebirth. The second phase that we all go through is going to be your ovulation phase, right?

Kenniqua Lewter (10:20)
You

XayLi Barclay (10:34)
For me in my follicular phase, I'm able to gather ideas and be excited, but I'm too excited to actually execute. So when I get to ovulation, it's an excitement, but more of a doing excitement, more of a grounded excitement, if that makes sense, right? Where I can make sense of things. And so I always take my follicular to get my ideas together. But in my ⁓ ovulation phase where I'm a bit more grounded, a bit more bossy, a bit more...

I'm centered, I'm able to execute on those ideas. I'm able to do sales calls, I'm able to close. My mind is so clear, maybe because that's where your body is going through getting an egg together. Or it's just so much power in that phase. And so in that phase is where I do webinars, sales calls, those kinds of things. make sure if I want to give my client my

best, will schedule it during ovulation. So, ovulation is usually a very busy week for me. And then we start heading into luteal phase. Luteal phase is when you start asking yourself if this business makes sense or if your life makes sense or ⁓ your friends and you're like, that is where you're starting to go inward.

Kenniqua Lewter (11:32)
Okay.

XayLi Barclay (11:52)
And it's the first phase of starting to be inward, right? It's where you actually begin to question yourself and think it's also because you're getting ready to head into your menstrual phase. And so, you you start overthinking a lot. This is where I lean into sales and maybe how my clients and customers might feel. And there was a time where I used to really get down on myself during the luteal phase because I also do have PMDD. And so,

Kenniqua Lewter (12:20)
Okay.

XayLi Barclay (12:22)
What happens there is I used to be so mad about my luteal phase, but I've learned to embrace it over the years and try to understand myself and the way I think, the way I think when it comes to sales and things that my clients might be struggling with. That's where I really take the time to gather information. It's also a time where you can do very detailed work. So for me, I have ADHD as well.

And so this is a time where I finish projects, like I'll put the cherry on top of the cake here, right? So I might lean more into editing if I want to, or more into like actually finishing, you know, all the steps to publishing a YouTube video, or just things that I feel like I might ⁓ finalize a launch plan that we have had for a long while going on. I'll do that work in that kind of time. So deeper work, more detailed work, and closing out.

Kenniqua Lewter (12:53)
Okay.

XayLi Barclay (13:16)
whatever I opened up in Follicular. And then menstrual is rest for me. So trash TV, movies, just things that I can even be inspired by. I look at a lot of documentaries and things at that time, but it's also a time to pour into myself, even though I'm in lots of pain and probably not feeling the best.

Kenniqua Lewter (13:24)
You

XayLi Barclay (13:38)
It's where I just get to veg and just be. And then I love it because it also prepares me for follicular again. So those were kind of the four phases in a roundup of what happens in that time. But if you need me to go into more details, I definitely can.

Kenniqua Lewter (13:53)
Yeah, no, love the way that you were able to go through and break that down. So let me ask you, as far as the client work that you do, how much client work would you say that you do that requires sales calls, maybe one, do you work a lot with one-on-one clients?

XayLi Barclay (14:10)
I don't, I actually don't. I used to though. So ⁓ sometimes you might hear me saying it and it's because I've been psychosyncing for so long that, you know, if that was what it was, then yes. So right now, no, I don't do a lot of client work. I work with people one-to-one sometimes. It has to be a really like special situation where I'm like, I really want to work with this person or they're like, my gosh, I need your help or.

So I don't do a lot of one-to-one long-term projects. Sometimes we also do get unstuck sessions, which I love doing those, where it's where you have my brain for 90 minutes and people get so much from those. And I'm also energized by them. But again, they're only done in ovulation.

Kenniqua Lewter (14:47)
Okay.

Okay, so most of the time, so the ovulation period is when you do the unstuck sessions if you have any, if there is any special one-on-ones then you do that and then the rest of the group projects like your webinars or any master classes, are those also done during ovulation? Okay, so that's, so that period is the time that like client facing is when you're going to show up for clients.

XayLi Barclay (15:12)
Absolutely. Yes.

Kenniqua Lewter (15:21)
Now I know that you do also work with brands. You work with some pretty large brands as well. How does that, how do the brands fit into your schedule? Because I know brands are a whole nother beast as far as when they want you to do something. So how does that work?

XayLi Barclay (15:39)
Yeah, you know, I've gotten to a point where I'm really picky and choosy about what brands I'm working with and what timelines I'm working with as well. So if it's something that we absolutely cannot fit into a month in advance, usually brands do think about that though. They'll reach out and you know, the deadline might be, you know, a month ahead or two months ahead. So I'm always able to fit it in into that timeframe. But

It's amazing because I don't have to overthink it. I actually know exactly when I can plan, record, edit, whatever needs to get done. I know when I can go through that full process, especially if I do have a month ahead. So that's the fun part. So it really doesn't affect it. In fact, I think it amplifies the work that I do because anytime we send anything to brands, they're blown away at what we've been able to accomplish.

Kenniqua Lewter (16:29)
Okay, okay, love that. let me ask you as well with this is that when you are, like what have you tried?

before because you've been doing the cycle syncing for a very long time. I actually attempted to do cycle syncing and it's so funny because the moment I said that I was going to try cycle syncing, I don't know if it's too much information or not, but I use birth control. So the moment that I said I was going to do cycle syncing, something happened where it went out of whack. And so it wasn't on the schedule of my pills. And so I'm like, well, hold on. I put it in my calendar.

based off my pills. And so I'm like, okay, now it's all out of whack. So now I have to try to go back and try to recalculate what's going on here.

XayLi Barclay (17:09)
Bye.

Kenniqua Lewter (17:15)
So my question was, were, actually I'll just ask the one question first, is what were you doing prior to doing cycle syncing? And why do you feel like it didn't work, whatever you were doing?

XayLi Barclay (17:26)
Yeah, you know, what I was doing was beating myself up. Right. So I know that I would have stressful cycles. I just noticed like, first of all, I want to say I started cycle thinking maybe in 2015 or 2016, somewhere around there. And so I realized that a lot of women don't have the time to sit with themselves.

and actually evaluate how they feel during each phase of their cycle. And so for me, I never knew how I felt. I always knew that I felt frustrated, right? But I always knew because since I was, as long as I've had my menstrual cycle, which I can't remember how old I was, maybe 13 or something like that, I would have painful menstrual cycles. So I always knew that that time was like,

kind of off limits for me. And it's one of the biggest reasons why I run a business right now, because I remember, you know, I can't tell my boss I can't work today because, you know, I have my period and nobody wants to hear that. We got goals, right? So it's also why I do run a business myself. And it's not to say that I cannot like live in a world where it is not a part of what I do, because I definitely can, but it's how I choose to live my life.

Kenniqua Lewter (18:32)
You

XayLi Barclay (18:47)
So before I started cycle syncing, I think for me as a business owner, I would feel so much guilt. And I think this is just how I grew up. you know, was born in the Caribbean, Caribbean family, Caribbean home. You can't lay down for three days, okay, in a Caribbean household. Something is wrong with you. So I used to feel a lot of guilt about getting my period and having to rest during that time.

And so ⁓ I started to realize, wait, this is my business. It's my time. I can actually build that rest into my business and be okay with it. But also going through understanding, you know, PMDD, which is having like immense depression right before your cycle. I started experiencing that. And so I realized, whoa, I really just have two weeks to live my life. Two weeks to get things done.

figure everything out and then I know the other two weeks I'm not going to be feeling all the way there and all the way clear. So obviously I started doing things to just live a healthier lifestyle, but having that two weeks and being cognizant of it really got me into figuring out, okay, so I'm not going to be mad or sad that I have two weeks to live my life quote unquote, but what I'm going to do is I'm going to parse out

Kenniqua Lewter (20:03)
Mm-hmm.

XayLi Barclay (20:07)
how I can do certain things in my business because I do know that in that two weeks, I have to maximize my visibility, have to maximize our revenue, I have to maximize partnerships, things that I have going on. Like it all has to kind of get done. It's not to say nothing gets done for the other two weeks, but I'm definitely gonna be lower key, probably less accessible or available. And so, you know.

I was just frustrated at first. Then I started figuring it out. And then the game changer for me was having my assistant who is on the front lines doing everything. So she also knows my cycle. So in our team meetings, that's one of the first things we cover. When is your cycle? So that we're able to use that as a marker to figure out everything else. Because my cycle is every month,

you know, we're able to use that as the marker to how we're running things and what we're doing and what we're not doing. And that is such a beautiful thing for me, because a lot of what people lack in their business and their visibility and showing up, you know, with content is consistency. So I use something that is happening every single month, whether I like it or not, to ground me into that consistency. So my cycle actually runs a lot of my business.

And even in our household, my husband told me some time ago, like, your cycle runs our household as well. And I'm like, really? And I was like, that's really thoughtful of you to think in that way of like, you know, what we're doing, what we're not doing, what we're having, what we're eating, all of those things, you know, because he's the chef in the house. But yeah, so, you know, like, it's really, I think for me, the biggest thing that I was before was probably more inconsistent and frustrated.

Kenniqua Lewter (21:45)
I'm

XayLi Barclay (21:56)
And now I am very consistent and not frustrated. I've built in that time to rest and that time to bust my ass and work really hard. Excuse my language, but yeah.

Kenniqua Lewter (22:09)
Yeah,

no, I really love that because so many times like on the podcast, of course, we talk so much about systems, but systems are really just doing things on a consistent.

XayLi Barclay (22:22)
Literally.

Kenniqua Lewter (22:23)
cadence

the way that it works for you. And so a lot of times we hear so many people talk about you have to batch, you have to do time block and you have to do this method and that method, but you don't care so much about people actually talking about cycle syncing that much. Even when I was looking to see about.

Possibly like what can I do about this cycle thing? And of course I automatically thought about you because you talk about it all the time But even when I went on YouTube, I didn't really see that many videos of anybody talking about it Yeah, yeah

XayLi Barclay (22:52)
Yeah, I need to make a long video.

Kenniqua Lewter (22:57)
Even the videos that were out, they were years old and I'm like, people aren't really talking about it, but it makes total sense because I know even with myself, I never realized like what you described to me about like the points of sometimes being kind of sad before your cycle. I never realized what any of this was before even diving into like, let me say, let me Google and see what this cycle sinking thing is. I never really thought about it, but I realized

XayLi Barclay (23:00)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Kenniqua Lewter (23:27)
maybe at the beginning of this year of just realizing like, man.

before my cycle, I go down this roller coaster. Like I'm down, it'll take one little thing and now I'm sad. It's like this one trigger and it's like, my goodness. And it can be something so small. And I'm like, why am I so sad? And I started to realize that it was happening to prevent myself from jumping on this roller coaster. It's like, hey, the roller coaster's here. You're going to jump on or jump off. So.

XayLi Barclay (23:35)
Yeah. Absolutely. The world is ending, girl.

Yeah, absolutely.

Yep, absolutely.

Kenniqua Lewter (23:59)
Yeah, so I started to realize that that was happening. so trying to get myself from not allowing it to happen, it was still quite difficult at certain points. So yeah, I definitely think I need to, it was just last month when I'm like, okay, I'm going to do this cycle syncing. And then I think I just, like I said, I, I missed a couple of pills. I'm only taking birth control only to like, we're not having any more kids, but I'm only taking it to kind of regulate myself.

XayLi Barclay (24:24)
I get it.

Yeah.

Kenniqua Lewter (24:26)
So

if I miss a few, it's okay. It's not like we're about to have any kids anymore anyway. So, but I think that's what happened. And so it kind of threw off my whole schedule and then I'm like, okay, I gotta try to get back onto it. But I definitely see how that is working for you. So ideally.

Do you also combine other methods? So like you have your cycle syncing and do you also say, okay, I'm doing my cycle syncing. So I know in my abolition week that I am going to do a lot of calls, maybe master classes, webinars, video content. Like you're really, you show up very consistent. How much do you post on Instagram a day? Cause it seems like you have a lot of content that goes out.

XayLi Barclay (25:12)
I have a lot. yeah. Sometimes it's three times a day. Sometimes it is, most times like we do maintain a baseline of once a day. Yeah. But sometimes it is three, two or three times a day.

Kenniqua Lewter (25:22)
Okay.

Okay, and so I guess my question is too, so are you also like combining other methods like, okay, so I'm going to go through on ovulation week and just batch. So do you also have those time periods where you're like, I'm going to batch 20 videos this week or 20 videos this day? Does that also kind of happen like that too?

XayLi Barclay (25:43)
Absolutely.

Yes. So when I am in my follicular phase, that's where I do most of my ideation and writing and scripting and all of that. The other thing that's really important for me during my follicular phase is to get ready, honey. So I know that ovulation week is when I'm recording a lot. I'm going to be front facing. I'm going to be on camera. So in my follicular week, I make sure that I'll do things like do my nails because I come out of my menstrual cycle raggedy. Okay. ⁓

Kenniqua Lewter (26:09)
No.

XayLi Barclay (26:12)
a mess when I get out of that

cycle. it's kind of like, like I'm saying a rebirth is when I think about, okay, so, you know, like, let me get back into my skin care. It's a reset for me because I am the type of person to fall off of things. So that's why when people come to me and they tell me, well, I can't be consistent with content, you're speaking to the most inconsistent, messy, artsy, creative person ever that has

come to learn systems that work for me. That's, you know, I have to actually, that's where my discipline comes in, maintaining my systems, looking for things that connect or that I can do over and over. Like, that's the part for me that, and I love it. ⁓ I love it so much. So.

For me, it's about making sure that in my follicular week, I might go get my nails done, get my toes done. I want to make sure that I'm coming into ovulation looking the way I feel, right? Because for me, if I don't look good, I don't feel good. I'll be honest. I have to be honest and say things like this, like this, because people think that, you know, I'm so confident that I can just pow pow and I can, but it's also effort. I need to make sure that I feel good about like,

Kenniqua Lewter (27:23)
you

XayLi Barclay (27:28)
how I look, what I'm saying, what I'm feeling, that kind of thing. And if not, you will know because I will say it literally. But yeah, so I make sure in my follicular week, I'm doing things like getting ideas together. I'm scripting, I'm writing, I'm probably at the coffee shop for a bit, like just zoning out, being creative. That's when I'm really bright, creative, excited. And so it's when I wanna write and research and all of that stuff. So when I get into ovulation, I...

look good, I feel good, nails are done, here is done, everything looks good, feel good. And so I'm ready to work and show up. So that is when I'm on camera most. So we will stack like things that are happening. So let's say I am already dressed. So today I'm dressed, it's 1130 a.m. I have lots of other front facing things going on today because I'm already dressed and ready. So we kind of stack that way too. So ovulation, yes, but also like

Because I do have back-facing days. So yesterday you didn't see me on stories or anything at all. If I was on stories, it probably was something that was pre-recorded already, right? So some days I'm not on camera, because you got to protect your piece. I'm not asking you to be there all day every day, right? So some days I am back-facing, which means nothing is going on and I'm probably working ferociously on something else or.

Kenniqua Lewter (28:35)
Okay.

XayLi Barclay (28:49)
or doing nothing at all because that happens too. And so, yeah, and I have my front facing days where, you know, I'll record probably two or three videos. Sometimes I do do 20 videos. I'm not going to lie. When I'm on fire, I'm on fire. ⁓ And so, you know, it depends on like what I have going on. ⁓ But yes, so I will batch during ovulation so that we have all of that content. My husband edits.

Kenniqua Lewter (29:00)
Whoa, 20 videos, that's good.

XayLi Barclay (29:15)
I used to edit, I still edit sometimes, especially if I'm really in my zone of creating a lot. Sometimes I'll edit because I'm excited and I love editing. It's relaxing to me, which is wild. But yeah, so then we go into the editing phase and then publish would be like, you know, during cycle, somebody else does that. But sometimes I do publish because I just love content and I love the process. I love the platforms. It's kind of weird, but luckily this is my job.

Kenniqua Lewter (29:24)
No.

XayLi Barclay (29:43)
But, you know, yeah, that would be kind of my process for it all. And just making sure that I'm a month ahead. Also, I will say I'm probably live more during follicular and during ovulation. I like going live and talking out my ideas sometimes because it helps me actually create the actual long form video I want to create, especially because I can.

Kenniqua Lewter (29:55)
Mm-hmm.

XayLi Barclay (30:07)
connect with people, learn what they really want to see, what are they looking, like, you know, it gives me a chance to tap in. And I feel like we don't talk out ideas enough, which is why I launched my membership, because I wanted people to be able to talk out there. Sometimes we're just creative and we're just in our own little world creating by ourselves and we don't have any input. We don't really know how real people feel about the content that we're creating as experts.

So being able to talk that out is so powerful. So the way that I do that is by going live. So yeah, that's kind of my process or how I fit it in.

Kenniqua Lewter (30:42)
Yeah, yeah, I love. ⁓ Yeah, yeah, you did answer that. You definitely answered that question. Yeah, I do love. I do love all of that. It's funny because, you said, even the last part that you were talking about talking out your your thoughts. Yeah, absolutely not. That's kind of like why are you on threads a lot? Yeah, I love threads. I find that if.

XayLi Barclay (30:43)
I hope I answered your question.

I love it.

Kenniqua Lewter (31:05)
Of course, it's it's text-based, so you're not actually verbally being able to say it, but that's why I kind of do like threads. I think as like an introvert, threads is kind of like my jam, because it's like, I don't have to worry about video. I don't have to worry about pictures. Let me just text what I'm doing today or type my thoughts really quickly. Yeah, it's going to go down the feed. Somebody is going to see it and maybe like it and maybe not. I definitely like that, but I do think.

XayLi Barclay (31:14)
That's so good.

Absolutely. Yes.

Literally. It's so good for testing

too, like testing ideas. Like, ooh, I want to make a video about XYZ. Yeah.

Kenniqua Lewter (31:33)
Absolutely.

Absolutely,

because people are definitely going to chime in on it. Definitely going to chime in. But I do like the idea, like you said, with the membership of being able to have people to voice your ideas too, because we don't a lot of times, unless we do put it like some, like in our stories or something like that and ask for feedback from our audience. And if you have a smaller audience, like I have a smaller audience. So if I put something in my stories, I might not get a response back, you know, maybe one or two, but it's from people that are

XayLi Barclay (31:38)
Absolutely.

Sometimes they don't answer. Crickets.

Kenniqua Lewter (32:05)
like more so my peers that aren't really going to purchase it from me. It's just they can just tell me, that's a good idea or not a good idea, but they're not necessarily my ideal client, if that makes sense. So, but I absolutely love that idea. So, so for someone like myself, that is like, okay, I think that I know that that is a missing piece as far as like my strategy and showing up. Cause right now I love doing podcasting. I love doing YouTube pretty much. It's to me the same.

XayLi Barclay (32:07)
Yeah.

Absolutely.

Kenniqua Lewter (32:34)
thing, sharpen the audio, podcast, YouTube, it's easy. Where I struggle at and have been for the longest time is just short form content, just being consistent doing that. And it's like some of the days is like, okay, I have it on my calendar, I'm going to batch. And then it happens where it'll be like, man, I said I was going to batch and now I'm on my cycle and I just want to sleep. I don't want to do any of this content. And so then it gets pushed back, you know, in the back burner. So for someone that

XayLi Barclay (32:36)
Literally.

Kenniqua Lewter (33:02)
is like me that probably realizes that this may actually work for me as a system to actually show up on social media for marketing, show up for your clients maybe in a better way. How would you say they should get started?

XayLi Barclay (33:18)
Yeah, mean, when I think about even what you're saying, like, I think it's really important to have your short form days and your long form days, right? So your days where you know you're creating like shorter bursts of content and, you know, your days where you are creating podcasts, YouTube videos and all of that. I just think it's just different space in our brains for some reason.

to be more intentional in that way. But the first thing I would tell you to do is sit down and literally map out your cycle, right? Whether you're using an app or you are using a literal calendar where you write things down. I do both because I love planning physically and I love planning digitally as well. I always have to report to my assistant when my next cycle is or even my cycle window, because sometimes we don't know the exact date. So we just block out seven days where

it's guaranteed to come in that time and then we work around it. But then we always know when we're coming close to it or there's respect there. And it also helped me to respect my body a lot more as well. So map out when your next cycle is coming. And I want you to sit down and think about all the things that you have going on and listen back to the episode.

Kenniqua Lewter (34:12)
up.

XayLi Barclay (34:32)
And think about the types of things that I put into specific times. This is also why I created a template for all of this, because I would actually forget what I would do during certain times of my cycle. My ADHD brain again. And so I started to write that down. Like, so I always knew like in groups, what things I would do during what parts of my cycle. And I want you to also

Write down the things that you're struggling with the most so that you can make them a priority in the right time. So if you know you're filled with ideas, or let me backtrack a little bit. I want you to start observing yourself in your first cycle.

So like I was saying, and like you said, K'Nigwe, you did not even realize, shoot, like I do get sad before my cycle. Or so I want you to really observe yourself and your natural flow. And the beauty of this is that you can take what I'm saying, but you can also observe yourself and see what works for you and what really doesn't work for you. I also want to mention for people that don't have cycles, you can also work by the moon because it's literally the same thing. So.

you know, and if you're a guy, you go through a full menstrual cycle in one day. Right. So, but essentially observe yourself, see how you feel during your follicular, see how you feel during your ovulation phase, see how you feel during your, because we have to be intentional. That's the actual thing. Right.

See how you feel during all of these phases and respect what you feel during each phase. There are some times where I beat myself up because I'm, I want to record something and I'm like, why can I not record this thing? It's cause you're not in this space or ⁓ phase to record it literally. Right. So then I have to respect it and be like, okay. I see my brain is too excited and on fire for me to even like put a video together and make it make sense. So.

If I really want to get this off, let me go live because I'm really excited about it right now. That kind of thing. So I want you to see what that feels like during each phase. So go through your testing phase, take a month and do that. And then next month, I want you to write down what you are struggling with doing the most. So for some people, they tell me, Xaelia, I can't even think about scripting content. Like I'm too busy. There's too much for me to do.

No, like if you sit down and script in that time and you have it and you hold it and you spend time with it, you're able to record that when you head into ovulation because you're more grounded, you're more connective, you wanna talk to people. That's when you probably are itching like, ooh, maybe I do wanna go to dinner tonight or maybe I do wanna go have drinks tonight. You're just more external is the term, right? So record, go live, like test those things.

Kenniqua Lewter (37:15)
Okay.

XayLi Barclay (37:19)
⁓ and then you come back to Lutile where you're a little bit inward, but you can really focus on detailed things, editing, know, publishing, maybe making your thumbnail, maybe finalizing which thumbnail and title you want to use in your video, that kind of thing. and then you'll hit that menstrual phase again. Now, what this also does is if you're listening, you'll realize that you get another chance every month. That's how I look at it. That's how it's completely changed my business because.

We'll have a month where it's like, this month was crazy or I didn't record any content this month. And you get so down on yourself because you start feeling like I'm inconsistent, I can't do this. All the things that you start telling yourself. Every month is a new chance to reset and not even based on just the calendar that we're living by, based on your body. Your body is resetting as well. So that's what I would say, K'Nigwe.

Kenniqua Lewter (38:14)
Yeah,

I love that like you said you have a new month a new next time to be able to go through and try it again So like if it didn't work this month

then it's like, okay, you get a chance to try it again and kind of get to a place where it is working for you. Like you're kind of getting by now, you've been doing it for years. So you've really gotten into your rhythm of, okay, this is how I go through. need to plan my videos. I need to script my videos. And then I need to record my videos. And then even, I like how even how you tag in your assistant. they are, she's on the same page where it's like, okay, I know exactly what Zili's

doing as well. So I absolutely love that and love this full conversation because it's very, very helpful. And I think a lot of entrepreneurs need to just know that there's more than just these typical systems out there that you can use to actually connect your body with the way that you want to work as a woman. And like you said, even as a man in cases as well, So I absolutely love that. And you said you have a template for this. So

XayLi Barclay (39:05)
Yes.

Yeah.

Kenniqua Lewter (39:23)
Where can we find the template?

XayLi Barclay (39:25)
Well, hopefully you would put it in the link, but yay. I don't have an actual website for it, which I should do. I should like get a .com for it. But if you come to my Instagram and you comment the word cycle on any post or you message me the word cycle, you will get that direct link to it. I can't even remember how much it is. It's like nothing, but it will change your life.

Kenniqua Lewter (39:28)
I am going to put it in the description.

XayLi Barclay (39:52)
if you are looking to cycle sync, because I've demystified it all for you.

Kenniqua Lewter (39:57)
Yeah, absolutely, absolutely. You make it where it's not hard and you can actually see like, oh, this is something that I can do. And it makes, it seems like a no brainer. It makes sense. And I think the template, it's like less than $10 or something like that, cause I bought it too, so.

XayLi Barclay (40:02)
Yeah, you don't have to figure this out.

you

got it. Thank you.

Kenniqua Lewter (40:13)
Yeah, so I think it's like less than 10 bucks or something

like that. So it's definitely worth it. So Zayla, I appreciate you and joining me today on the podcast. You did say if they go to Instagram, can you please let people know what your Instagram is so they can stay connected with you as well.

XayLi Barclay (40:28)
Yes, my Instagram is at xaelibarkley. It's x-a-y-l-i-b-a-r-c-l-a-y everywhere.

Kenniqua Lewter (40:34)
Thank you so much. Well, I appreciate you having coming onto the episode and we'll close it out here.

XayLi Barclay (40:40)
Thank you for having me. Bye, guys.